I’ve got your hand

I remember riding a roller-coaster when I was rather young. It was an old rickety wooden thing, and to my young eyes it reached to the sky. When the cars stopped at the top of the climb and the hydraulics hissed I knew, beyond any doubt, that that was not a good place to be.  I knew I was going to fall, and no little bar over my legs would stop me. I could hear people laughing and talking and for a moment I wondered why I was so weird. Then we fell. Even then the logical part of my body knew it was under control, but that didn’t matter. Nothing my brain said mattered- and I knew just as well that we were rather assuredly out of control. It was wretched, and I couldn’t say anything because everyone else was having fun. I wasn’t nearly the adrenaline junkie that I am now as an adult. 

A few years ago, I took my children to the same park- I hadn’t been in years. I was shocked how small everything was, how simple even. My daughter grabbed my hand and started running – yes running, straight to the Big Dipper. My heart sank a little. I love roller coasters now, I run from one to another at large amusement parks, so surely I could ride this one again, but that wasn’t excitement rushing through me. I looked down and saw her goofy crooked smile, and sighed. We sat down.  The bar fell. We climbed the hill with people laughing behind us. I looked over again and saw a look in her eyes I remembered. As the hydraulics hissed I let loose of the bar and took her hand, “Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” Her smile returned and we fell. 

We fell for a fraction of an instant and went into a curve. My now adult brain realized this little ride was less steep that our main road, and started to laugh. The rest of the ride I told her what was coming up and held her straight in curves, and basically just talked to her. When we stopped she hugged my neck and said she always knew she was safe because I was there and had already seen so much. We rode it a half dozen times again that night. 

 I guess sometimes having someone who has seen and done more than you hold your hand really does make all the difference.

“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you. ‘Do not fear, I will help you. Do not be afraid, for I myself will help you,’ declares the Lord, your Redeemer, the Holy one of Israel” Isaiah 41:13-14